To Cope With Aerophobia: My Personal Experience

by Alexandra Mansilla

To Cope With Aerophobia: My Personal Experience

9 Aug 2024

Photo: Alexander Mils

I started travelling when I was about 12 and immediately fell in love with everything about it — the packing, the airport hustle, the three hours spent waiting for my flight. My excitement only grew when I first travelled solo to a summer camp in Spain at 14 and then when I visited my aunt (in Spain, too). I felt like I was living out my own movie, jetting from one airport to the next with my stylish little suitcase. It also felt like I was living the busy adult life (little did I know how far from reality I was, haha!).

Every trip was a countdown for me. I eagerly awaited the day to fly out. I couldn’t understand how anyone could be afraid of flying. I was always the person who comforted friends during takeoff or turbulence, holding their hands and making sure they felt safe because flying never scared me.

But then 2022 rolled around, and out of nowhere, I became terrified of flying. As my family was getting ready to move to Spain, I found myself dreading the flight.

Here is what it was like for me, and I know it might sound a bit over the top (bear with me, it is what aerophobia does to you):

— I started seeing omens in everything. If my dog barked too much or seemed sad, I would think it was a bad sign.

— Bad weather, especially thunderstorms, would send my imagination into a tailspin.

— I would eye everyone at the gate, convinced there were suspicious characters among us.

— I couldn't help but think of Lost every time I flew, which really freaked me out.

— There is this story Leonardo DiCaprio shared on Ellen about a plane engine catching fire — thank you, Leo, that story haunted me every time I boarded a flight.

— I would tell myself it is safer than driving, but that didn't really help.

— I watched the flight attendants like a hawk, looking for any sign they were worried.

— Seeing "row 13" on my ticket would freak me out because of the bad luck associated with the number in my culture.

— I secretly wished for flight cancellations so I wouldn’t have to go through with it.

Flying became more than an inconvenience; given how much we travelled, it was a real issue. I knew I had to deal with it somehow.

One of the worst flights was a four-hour journey during which we hit turbulence. To me, it felt like the end of the world. I was convinced we were going down. I even had this crazy thought that I would be the sole survivor, so I always used to keep my phone fully charged, just in case.

When the turbulence eased, I was still panicking. I hesitated, but eventually, I pressed the call button. A wonderful flight attendant came and calmed me down.

When we landed, I was convinced that it was time to cope with my fear. I shared my phobia with my friend, Sophie She, who offered a quirky lifehack: she imagines the layers of air as slices of cake, with the plane resting on the top slice. While this visualisation didn't cure my phobia, it helped shift my perspective, allowing me to think of the plane as something more familiar and less frightening.

I started thinking, “What’s actually scaring me?” First, I don’t know a thing about how plane engines work, so I can’t do much if something goes wrong. I just had to tell myself to trust the pilot — after all, he knew more than I did. And then there is the shaking. That always freaks me out.

I thought: "I drive a car on bumpy roads, why not think of the sky as a road and the plane as my car?" That mindset shift helped me get over my fear. Now, I am not saying the anxiety doesn’t try to creep back in, but I don’t let it take hold anymore.

by Alexandra Mansilla